i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
