he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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