paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Randomize
