we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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