didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Randomize
