Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
