Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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