Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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