At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
vagina is talking i cant
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
