Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
