She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
