my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
