I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Alive.
So much puke
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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