So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Randomize
