You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
