Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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