Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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