I think scott just propositioned me for sex
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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