Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
