I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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