His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i don't like sucking hair
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
this beer tastes like vomit already
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize