She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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