The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
