it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
You pole danced in your parka.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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