She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
