i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize