And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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