are you so shy because you have an std?
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
