ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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