She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Randomize
