All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
