windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I still have a little drunk in my system
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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