do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
