party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
North Korea, Best Korea!
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
