Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Randomize
