yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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