I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Randomize