@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
The power of my boobs compel you
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
