The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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