The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
