More tranny stories later!
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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