She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
