last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
