last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
