So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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