walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I have post one night stand depression
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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