hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
