it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
