I smell stomach acid.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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