Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
