ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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