does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize