i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Are we still banned from the library?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
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